Learnings from 2016

It was an interesting year, one I was not really sorry to say goodbye to, however on reflection I believe I did learn a few things over that time.

The year before had ended rather nastily, so when the new year arrived I was still licking my emotional wounds.  So I wallowed for a while, feeling rather sorry for myself.   Now thats an okay thing to do, but dragging it out is not.

I came to the realisation that if anything was to change then it had to be my attitude.  So I set out to work on that, which can be a difficult thing to do  — as opposed to the easier option of sitting back and blaming everything around me for my situation.

Now throughout this time – and I’m talking about months here – I was supported by some absolutely amazing friends.  They were awesome, and they put up with me, empathised and generally nurtured me through it all.  But they listened.  It is so good to have someone really listen to you.  To be heard.

Anyway, I decided that I had to change my attitude, because continuing the way I was, was probably going to lose those friends — maybe — did I say how awesome they are?

Little by little I gained confidence in myself again and then I set some small goals — not the New Year Resolution type, just little ones that were achievable, and ones that would stick.

By the end of the year I felt that I was under control, in charge of my life again.  Some of those small goals I set myself, I’m still doing today.  For instance I had stopped writing — one of my passions, so I re-visited The Artists Way, by Julia Cameron and followed the steps.  That meant writing every morning again, not for anyone to read, but as a tool to get back into the groove.  Plus it is a place where you can write about whatever pisses you off and it won’t be read by anyone but yourself.   That was a twelve week agreement with myself, and six months later I am still writing every morning.  So that little goal became a habit, a good one.

The next goal I set myself was to walk everyday, just for twenty minutes, which is not much really and quite achievable.  That was also for twelve weeks, and I’m still doing it because once again it’s a habit and it feels good.  So why stop?

So some of the things I learnt las year were:

  • friends are amazing, nurture them because they have no obligation to stick around, unlike relatives who have no choice
  • aim to be the friend that you need — follow the example of the awesome friends and you can’t really go wrong
  • set small achievable goals and stick to them until they become habits
  • then add in another goal that you’d like to become a habit et cetera

As for those awesome friends, well they know who they are, and I love and value  them immensely.

Now I’m rather looking forward to 2017 and whatever this year brings.

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