Of the many failings we have in being a part of the human race, the one where we get attached to objects, outcomes and feelings is probably the silliest.
Now theres probably nothing wrong with that, excepting for how we go about the attachment.
Starting with things — take my car for instance. I’m attached to it, I like it and at times I even love it. But after all it is a ‘thing’ and cannot love me back — it gets me from A to B whenever I need it to as long as I keep it fuelled, watered and oiled. I even spring for an occasional service to ensure it keeps going. Its comfortable with a heater and air conditioner that work really well; the fuel economy is good and theres’ enough power in the engine to get me out of a sticky situation on the road. I pay the registration to entitle me to drive it on the road, as well as insurance— but in the end it is just a car, it does what it was designed to do and thats that.
Then there is the house I live in. I like it as well, and at times I even love it. But really it is a roof over my head, somewhere I can store all the other ‘things’ I’ve collected over the years. Someplace I can cook meals, relax, entertain and tend the garden as I grow vegetables and herbs to use. Yes, I am nesting, making it a more comfortable place to live in — especially as I spend quite a lot of time here. For the past nineteen years I’ve made sure that the mortgage that is in mine and Ross’s names is paid on time, that insurance and rates are paid, but I’ve only lived in it for around two and a half years. So yes I’m attached to it, but I’m not living for it and if I had to walk away from it I could. Yes, its in a good location and has most of what we need, but it is also part of a breakdown in a family relationship and for that reason alone I won’t become too emotionally attached to it.
A natural part of our make-up is to become attached emotionally to people. Most of us do. The first is usually to our family, although some people seem to have no qualms about walking away from that. Each to his own as the saying goes.
We make friends at school, our workplace and develop our own social life away from home. Some of those friendships last our lifetime, many move on and are only remembered occasionally, if at all. Tomorrow we farewell a friend we’ve known for over four decades, and it will be a very somber occasion at first. Later we will reminisce over the memories we’ve gathered in that time. We will probably laugh a lot, and shed a few tears, so sad —but it will be good.
Occasionally we can let our attachments develop into obsessions — being too hung up on the outcome of what we desire to deal with it rationally. We can become too attached to an outcome to really enjoy life. Often more concerned about looking good to consider what is vital.
When all is said and done it is the people you have in your life that are the most important — not the possessions.