Stories

Our lives are filled with stories.  We tell them all the time.  We use them to justify our actions, our experiences and a myriad of other reasons that occur in our everyday lives.

For example, I recently attended a weekend seminar where we got to delve deep into what makes us tick.  One thing we had to do in preparation was to decide what aspect of our lives we needed to work on over the weekend.

After much thought I decided that although I seem to be able to communicate quite well with my writing, I didn’t feel that I was communicating orally very clearly.  So I came to the conclusion that I needed more work in that area and off I went to the seminar.

When I shared my issue with another attendee, the response was that I was being ridiculous, that if I could write a book, then there was no real reason for me to think I couldn’t communicate well with the spoken word also.

It didn’t even take one day for me to work out that I’d been telling myself a story about being a poor communicator.  I stood up in front of over one hundred people —strangers most of them and spoke quite comfortably plus I got my message across.

So I had to ask myself the question regarding my thinking.  Why did I think I wasn’t any good at communication?

Looking at that, I realised the story part of it was true and that the rest was ridiculous.  But I’d been using that story to justify why I wasn’t doing well in other areas of my life.  It seems that you don’t even have to tell yourself the story very often for you to believe it.  For it to become fact.

Seemingly it is very easy to believe the negative stories in our lives, often they only need one small trigger to set us up in that story and we tell ourselves it is real.  When in fact it has evolved from — in my case — a simple set back that had me believing my story.

Now for some inexplicable reason, we don’t seem to take the positives in our lives and turn them into awesome stories.  I’m not sure why not.  Maybe it’s related in my case, to my mother telling me not to brag about myself.  Being told that talking about myself in that way is just not acceptable to others.

Perhaps I’ll never know, but I’m now in the process of looking at other areas of my life that are quite possibly stories that I can eliminate also.

What stories do you tell about yourself that just maybe aren’t true?  Where do you tell yourself ‘I can’t do that because…..’

 

 

Excuse me?

Sometimes it seems I let my life be run by excuses.

When I stop and think about it, I find that there are so many ‘reasons’ I use to explain why I didn’t do something.  Many have become habits.  Sometimes I call it procrastination, but whichever word I use, it’s really the same thing.

Now that I’ve actually identified that I do use excuses in my everyday life, I can see that perhaps it is time to knuckle down and eradicate a few of these from my life.

I didn’t go for my walk today because it was too cold.  Or —I ran out of time as I have to go to work today and if I’d gotten up earlier I wouldn’t have had enough sleep!  Plus I won’t be able to go after work as it will be too dark — and too cold again.

I didn’t make that phone call because they might be picking the kids up from school, driving, getting tea ready, going out or whatever!

When I have more time I’ll be able to do X, but I’m really too busy at the moment.

Or, when I’ve saved some more money I’ll be able to afford to do Y but money is a bit tight at the moment……

I also hear some of these in others as I go about my daily life.  I know I am not alone in using excuses for a myriad of things, but that doesn’t make it all right.

I think I’ve become so accustomed to using excuses that they have begun to seem normal, as part of my everyday life.

Oh and I meant to call so and so, but it got too late and I never phone anyone after nine thirty at night.  That would be rude!

I sometimes wonder just what life would be like without excuses.

How would I function?  Somehow I imagine I’d be extremely productive, I think in reality I would most likely have more time for leisure activities and just maybe I’d be a lot more successful than I am now.

Well, I can only write a short blog today as I have to go to work and if I do any more I will be late….

 

What’s your excuse??