Progress

Progress happens whether we wish it or not. Yesterday when I was out for my walk and standing on the hill, I looked over the mushrooming new housing development below. I suppose it could be called change as well, but many see it as progress. Initially I found it a bit overwhelming — with all the extra traffic passing my home. But I’ve become accustomed to it over the past months.

I guess that seeing the cement works silos razed to the ground could be identified as both change and progress. But it sure seems more windy now that they’ve been removed from their sentury duty at the top of the hill. The practical brick veneer home next door was also demolished some months ago and now we are waiting to see what will be built there too. Will it be a house or two story units? What will happen to our privacy if there are high units next door ? It is probably a safe bet that it will be two story units, although at present they would be welcome as they’d block some of the wind from us. But as there are several newly built double storey units appearing up the street I suppose that is what will happen beside us too.

Progress comes at a cost — things that are dear and familiar to us often disappear and are replaced with what is seen as modern and therefore better than before. And we accept it reluctantly. Yet it is not just measured by buildings. We ourselves make progress in our lives and often without realising it. We take small steps yet when we look back those small steps collectively make up to big leaps.

I remember in the early years after Kelly died, when I was still miserable in my grief. I felt then that I would never be able to find joy in life again, that I’d always be a shadow of my former self. Yet now as I reminisce it is very evident that this is not the case. That I’ve managed somehow lot move with the times and get on with life and really it’s not that bad. And this progress is truly welcomed.

We’ve had so much change in our lives here in Victoria and life as we knew it in February is vastly different to the one we have in August. Yet despite the restriction and hardship these have caused, there is progress being made in the reducing numbers of daily new cases of Covid-19 — although the death toll is still too high.

I choose to be grateful for the enforced slow-down of life since the advent of Covid. When I look back I see that life was beginning to resemble that of a mouse on its treadmill — busy, busy, busy. So to not have to rush from appointments to more of the same is a relief. The changes that have come over the past few months are welcome as they have given me time to assess what I really want in my life.

Of course I do miss meeting my friends and family and being able to hug them, and there will always be time for them. But I’ve realised that happiness does not depend on the number of activities you can fit into one week. So I’m choosing quality over quantity from now on.

#copingsuicide #blacklivesmatter #progress